“It’s All Good”

Reading Time: 5 minutes

By Michael Avery

“By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you’ll become happy; 
if you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher.”
Socrates

Our friend, Rich, understands that every situation can be viewed in a positive light. “It’s all good,” he says.

At first, I thought he was saying “have a nice day” in a new, catchier way. Rich is cool, you know. But now, I see the phrase as something much more important: a powerful spiritual exercise for healing our past.

When Rich found out that Pichaya and I were getting married, not surprisingly, he replied, “It’s all good.”

And it has been good. Pichaya is my best friend, not to mention the most loving person I have ever known. She is teaching me about self-love and often reminds me that happiness comes from within. Pichaya created this blog with technical support from her son, Nate, and daughter, Jamie.

But “Is It Really All Good?“

I’ve spent considerable time contemplating on Rich’s statement. Rainier cherries have arrived, and soon local strawberries will be ripe. Who wouldn’t say, “‘It’s all good’ to that?”

But what about those other things, those moldy lemons at the bottom of the bag? “Not so good,” right? And those minor and major annoyances in life that we tend to complain about: A barking dog in the middle of the night, a stubbed toe on our way to the bathroom, a chip in our windshield, burnt toast, a painful ending to a cherished relationship, and so on.

As you probably know, complaining is a habit, a pessimistic way of viewing life. The frowning cat in the picture probably thinks the beautiful, tasty strawberries in the bowl are a little too perfect to eat. 

A single complaint is the first link in the chain of unhappiness. The Universe fills our bowl with whatever we focus upon. When we focus on the positive, life brings us cherries; if we focus on the negative, we get moldy lemons. It’s the basic Law of Attraction. If we monitor our thoughts for an hour, we may be surprised where our attention leads us. 

The Spiritual Exercise

One day, I created a spiritual exercise that I regularly use to shift from complaining and blaming to understanding, acceptance, and, eventually, gratitude. I’m not always able to make the shift on the fly, but I’m getting better at it. Sometimes a bit of reflection is needed before arriving at “It’s all good.”

The exercise goes like this: Whenever something happens in our life that causes us physical, emotional, or mental pain, we immediately say to ourselves, silently or aloud, “It’s all good.” We then look for the lesson or hidden treasure in the experience.

Surprisingly, the inspiration to write down and pass along this exercise didn’t come from a spiritual contemplation; it came from a trip to the garbage bin.

I remember the day I heard it—the inner voice. I was standing in front of the large garbage bin outside the building where I worked. In my right hand, I held a large white trash bag. 

Per my usual routine, I lifted the heavy metal lid with the same hand that held the bag. Up until this point, I’d always been quick enough to open the lid, throw in the bag, and pull back my hand before the lid slammed down with a resounding thud. It was a game I took pride in winning. 

This time, however, I was too slow withdrawing my hand. I can still feel the excruciating pain and see blood oozing from an open gash. As I was dancing around, searching my mind for a colorful and appropriate complaint, I heard the inner voice say, “It’s all good, remember?” I burst out laughing.

And it was good. What a great opportunity to balance some karma from the past! I was one step closer to spiritual freedom now that I had repaid this slightly painful debt to life.

A Higher View

When we step back and view a painful experience from the Soul perspective, it’s easy to see that everything is in divine order—It is all good. 

To completely learn a lesson in this world of opposites, we must experience both polarities. We learn what it’s like to steal an apple, for example. Then, at a later date, someone takes an apple from our lunch box at work. 

Instead of complaining about bad luck or devious coworkers, we could say to ourselves inwardly, “So that’s what it feels like to have something stolen. Now, I fully understand the ‘lesson of stealing’ and won’t attract the experience ever again. Blame and judgment are always trumped by self-awareness, understanding, and personal responsibility.

Add a Little “Pono”

Recently, I began using this exercise to revisit painful incidents from my past. The hurt I’d caused others due to my lack of awareness produced longstanding guilt and other destructive emotions. 

One incident stands out. As I look back on it now from a higher perspective, I realize that my seemingly thoughtless action held an important lesson for the other person’s spiritual growth. I was playing a valuable role. 

By using the spiritual exercise, “It’s All Good,” along with the following affirmation, I was able to free myself from those repressed feelings of guilt. This brought me one step closer to loving myself. 

I often use Ho’oponopono, a Hawaiian method of balancing and healing our past with love and understanding. When I first began this practice, I would repeat Dr. Hew Len’s now-famous phrase: “I love you, I’m sorry, please forgive me, I’m sorry.”¹ Now, I add my own words at the end:

I love you, I’m sorry, please forgive me, thank you.
I understand now. It is all good. 

Louise Hay

Unresolved emotional issues from the past manifest as symptoms in our bodies. For example, recently a painful corn suddenly showed up on the bottom of my left foot. In Louise Hay’s, You Can Heal Your Life, there is a chart linking physical ailments to their emotional causes. A corn is associated with “stubbornly holding on to the pain of the past.”²

By examining one especially painful event in my life, I discovered the true cause of my corn. I was still holding on to abandonment, sadness, and resentment surrounding the breakup with my first girlfriend in high school. 

Pichaya kindly purchased a package of treated corn pads from the market, and I began repeating my modified Ho’oponopono saying. I also added the affirmation suggested by Louise Hay: “I move forward, free from the past. I am safe, I am free.” 

It became clear why my girlfriend and I both needed to move on. There were other people we were destined to meet during that period of our young and impressionable lives. To my surprise, it took only three weeks for my foot to completely heal. The corn facilitated a positive change.

Shifting our awareness and viewing life through the eyes of Soul takes practice. Even today, when small things irritate me, I sometimes revert back to my old patterns. Thankfully, while I’m scanning my memory bank for the perfect complaint, Pichaya steps in with a reminder. She’ll say, “It’s all good, remember?”

I always respond with those four magic words every spouse loves to hear: “You are right, Honey!”

1. Zero Limits, by Joe Vitale, contains information about Dr. Hew Len and Ho’oponopono.
2. Louise Hay, You Can Heal Your Life, p.162